Thursday, December 31, 2009

as the year closes ...



all of us "older" folks always say "where did the year go???"... but i mean, really, didn't it go by quickly?  i must readily admit to being glad that 2009 is DONE ... it was an emotional year for me ... filled with family anxiety... it was also a year of drawing on God ... leaning on His wisdom ... reading MORE of His word ... trying to live what i did read ... and my prayers would sometimes just be "Lord i don't know, but You do ... Lord Lord Lord ... please Lord ... have Thy way Lord ... " then many moments of silence, just not knowing how to pray ...
 
the year did hold joyous moments too ... serene times ... watching the diamonds glisten and dance on the river ... or seeing those same elusive diamonds in the fresh fallen snow ... diamonds that you can't grasp in your hand, but that you can feel in your heart ... a gladness that God was always there, despite sorrows ... reminding me that i couldn't "be God" to my loved ones ... i couldn't make maria better ... i couldn't take away leo's chronic pain ... i couldn't make others DO what i knew without a doubt God's Word tells them to, so that they could be freed from the chains that they battle against ...

which brings us to me - and how i want to control things ... you know, just to make peoples lives better ... ... as if that isn't something God wants for them too!!!  and what He wants for me, His child, is to lay my burdens down and rest in Him ... to continue talking to Him about all my concerns - yes ... but then leaving those concerns there and being free to see the beauty He's put in my world ... the glittering water diamonds ... His Word that i can handle and read ... the many  many blessings i have ...

i hope that i can live 2010 as a wiser child of God ... i pray i can be a witness to others who need to hear the things i've learned in 2009 ... and i hope i remember to rest in Him, Jesus - who has redeemed me for all eternity ...

blessings on your 2010, dear blog buds...




20 comments:

Mari said...

Good thoughts to end the year, and begin a new one. Happy New Year to you and Leo.

Felisol said...

Dear Saija,
Happy New Year to your and yours.
In a Norwegian boo "From the world of prayer" I read 40 year ago, "Prayer isn't about how we articulate or cleverly we do present ourselves to God.
Faith is simply that we are coming to him in our need with all our anxiety, emptiness and failures. Remember the publican whispering: Lord have mercy. He went saved home to his house."

These sentences have given me courage and power to stay in front of my God, little and weak as I am. I come, He sees everything, and guess what; this is how He can use me.
Amazing grace.
From Felisol

Susan said...

Such sweet, pure goals that we all need to reach for and walk in. Oh, I think laying down the "control" thing is truly dying to self. I know as a mother, that has been a hard one for me but I'm finally learning it. Praise God for His patience.
Susan

Cathy said...

Thanks for those thoughts, sweet friend. Wishing you and Leo and blessed Happy New Year ~ Love, Cathy

Rodney Olsen said...

Happy New Year. I've enjoyed following the journey with you throughout 2009 and look forward to your posts in 2010.

Sara said...

so lovely to wave good bye to the new year in the "company" of friends. enjoy your quiet home and blessings on you and Leo in 2010.

jel said...

hApPy NeW yEaR :)


huggs

Deborah said...

Beautiful post Saija! I think many of us are glad to see 2009 go out and 2010 come in...filled with the promise of new beginnings....and with God, every day is a new beginning...it's all up to us how we will use the time he gives us. I've enjoyed visiting and getting to know you over the past year, and look forward to visiting more in the coming year.
Hope you and Leo have a peaceful new year.

Flip Flop Floozie said...

What a grand and lovely post for today! Thanks for stopping by. I did not go and stay in the hospital but sometimes I think that i should have. I am getting better a little bit every day. Tonight am hurting but hopefully the pain pill will start soon. I just want to get back to me again!! Now I see that was not too bad!! Smile!!
Take care and have a wonderful 2010..you know God takes care of us and you are like me wantin to take care of everyone..We "cannot" do that..
Sandy

Sita said...

Saija, your 'wiser' prayer already evident in your post. Love your words. They ring in my spirit.
Happy New year.
Love, Sita

Pat said...

Dear Friend, you are like one of those diamonds that glisten on the water. When you think you are not shining as brightly as you should, your loving heart always shines a tender beam of light.
You have been such a blessing to me, Leo and Maria have been "family" that I continue to hold in prayer.
May this new year bring you peace, healing for your family and may our friendship continue to grow in the Lord! How wonderful He is!!

Maggie Ann said...

The year has gone by so quickly! Its hard when we want so badly to see changes for the good and must be quietly patient. Resting in the Lord. You expressed it so beautifully. Happy New Year dear friend! *hugs*

auntibeck said...

OH MY, YES. I want to be wiser as well...and rest in the Lord, and be willing to change my stubborn ways, and to be salt, and light.

Tim said...

Happy New Year Saija and Leo! Health and His peace to you.

Weeble's Wobble said...

Hi Saija, happy new year!!! I've started blogging again but in a new blog. Hope you will drop by.
Wendy aka Mrs. Diamond

grammy said...

nice post
love that picture
blessings

Jammie J. said...

2009 was indeed an emotional year.

Here's to a better 2010.

Happy New Year to you and Leo.

Crown of Beauty said...

Dear Saija,
This year end post is so special. I loved your words, talking about the glittering diamonds that you can't grasp with your hands but which you can feel in your heart, a gladness that God is always there despite sorrows...

Oh yes, we can't be God to our loved ones.

I just love the way you put it.

Dear friend, you have been an encouragement to my heart this past year. I thank God for the gift that you have been to me.

I want to encourage you as the new year unfolds. I have been tremendously blessed by your friendship.

Love
Lidj

daisymarie said...

You really are such a blessing. Praying that this year you accomplish much and reach many!

sonja said...

I just hopped over from Felisol's blog. I love what you have posted here. It sounds a lot like my thoughts going into this new year.

I'll be back to visiit. Thank you for sharing!

Sonja